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We are all embodied in cultural contexts.

These cultural contexts shape us. They go beyond extrinsic factors such as dress and gestures – they are deeply embedded mental constructs such as social hierarchy, relationships, money, the nature of work. In short, how we view and interact with the world.

As college counsellors, we are often placed at important life intersections with various stakeholders, most likely drawn from different cultural contexts.

Higher education determines one’s social position in many countries, as well as the financial standing of future generations. Naturally, culture casts an intricate shadow here.

Effective communication is at the crux of our day-to-day work as counsellors. Our responsibilities range from holding heart-to-heart conversations with students to crafting information sessions for parents, drafting emails to admissions officers, pitching ideas to the leadership team, training teachers in writing letters of recommendation and messaging alumni – all of which might easily end up happening in a single day.

And our communication stretches wide: to students, parents, admissions officers, secondary leadership, teachers and other college counsellors. Compounding the situation, we are often all from disparate cultural contexts, sometimes more than one, and this has profound implications for the texture of our communication.

What is cross-cultural communication?

Given the breadth of tasks, stakeholders and cultures we engage with on a daily basis, we must strive for effective cross-cultural communication.

First, let’s , which is the process of exchanging ideas, thoughts, opinions, knowledge and data so that the message is received and understood with clarity and purpose. When we communicate effectively, both the sender and receiver feel satisfied.

How do we ensure that the people we are communicating with understand the messages we send to them and that we understand what they tell us? And not just about surface-level tasks, but about matters that run deep – such as social standing, finances, ambitions, futures – that form the crux of counselling discussions.

To achieve this effective cross-cultural communication, we must strive to be culturally competent.

How to achieve cultural competence

Cultural competence comprises three elements: knowledge, attitudes and skills.

Reflecting on each element and applying them to our jobs can help us to be more effective cross-cultural communicators.

Key attitudes for cultural competence are as follows: respect, openness, curiosity and discovery. Moving beyond one’s comfort zone and the possibility of seeing the world from more than one perspective are crucial.

When a student comes into your office, demonstrating these attitudes towards whatever they say – from the majors they’d like to pursue to their anxiety about predicted grades, their conflicts with their parents and their inspiration for a personal essay – allows the student to feel that they are truly respected as fellow human beings and that you are open to and curious about what they’ll bring to the table. 

The facets of cultural competence

Knowledge can be broken down into three further aspects: cultural self-awareness (realising how one’s culture has influenced one’s identity and world view), culture-specific knowledge (deep cultural knowledge, including an understanding of other world views) and sociolinguistic awareness.

For instance, a parent across the table might not seem to understand your point about how university rankings don’t determine the quality of education. Instead of launching into a tired tirade (internally or externally), take a moment to think about their cultural environment: their workplace, their family, their friends, their educational background and what’s taken for granted there. And then think about what you take for granted in your cultural sphere: your workplace, the college counselling world, your social circles, your educational background.

This might help you to understand the parent – and yourself – better. And it may help you to achieve the goal you both share – success for the student – even if it might look and feel different from how you initially perceived it.

Skills pertain to the acquisition and processing of knowledge: observation, listening, evaluating, analysing, interpreting and relating.

Given the amount of culture-specific knowledge we have to juggle, we need to take a proactive stance. This can vary wildly, from learning how to greet a parent or a figure of authority properly, to learning to tread carefully when talking about certain culturally sensitive topics, to decoding the underlying intention in a message written in a tone you’re not used to.

If we apply the three elements – attitude, skills and knowledge – we move from being culturally incapable or culturally blind to culturally competent or culturally proficient, as can be seen in . 

Continual learning

And keep in mind that this should be a continual practice. We all naturally have a tendency to be egocentric: to interpret the world and others according to our own points of view. This is a very natural human tendency, but one that has to be suspended in order to allow yourself to see the world from the other person’s point of view in a counselling context.

And because of the sheer number of cultures we interact with, it’s likely that we will constantly be humbled, discovering new things to learn every day. It might be frustrating at times, but I like to remind myself that it is a privilege to be in such a role and to encounter such a diversity of people and cultures on a daily basis.

In sum, to be effective communicators in our jobs, and to allow the person across the table – whether student, parent, admissions officer, alumnus, teacher or school leader – to feel truly listened to, we must let go of our preconceived notions and pay attention, fully, to what matters to them.